Too Much = Not Enough

Hello Divergents,

I write to you today from that tricky place of feeling simultaneously too much AND not enough.

Oof.

What I need from someone is something they can't give. Message received: Too much. I am simply too much!

If I'm too much, then why does it feel like I'm not enough? Not enough for that job, or that relationship, or that other relationship, or this challenge, novelty, or experience?

I'm talking big-time connection issues here.

Isn't that where we all really get caught up? How we relate to others & how they relate to us - bosses, coworkers, friends, kids, parents, neighbors, partners, etc?

It's challenging to navigate these - almost all the time.

We want to be enough. We need to be enough. But things come along that make us feel like we aren't doing it right and never will.

For our sensitive hearts, we don't know if we can take it anymore. We want to curl up in a ball and hide away from life. We want to run away, screaming all along the way, but it's hard to scream through your tears.

This is a tough note, Divergents, to wrap up, but if you've ever felt this way. I see you; you're not alone.

It is true, too, as you open up, you will find circumstances and relationships, where things are easy - this too makes it hard to open up, perhaps more than when things are challenging.

You've felt this too, I'm sure.

This is a love note to those of us risking to show up as ourselves with open hearts to our present circumstances, even when we want to shut down, because we cling to the hope that we are not alone and there are other lonely souls looking to not be too much AND to be enough. And that we're all more lonely than we let on.

What sacred space it is to find belonging - no matter how fleeting! And I've know that space, even today, as well as yesterday, in spite of heartbreak, in spite of being confused and not feeling enough and fearing I'm too much.

Life has many questions. It is better when we show up as ourselves. Even heartbreak can give answers, even as it gives us new questions.

Rooting for you.

-Elle Sequoia Brave

1. What are your open-hearted lessons from heartbreak?

2. What keeps you going deciding to be yourself?

3. What keeps you from showing up as yourself?

4. What helps you show up for others as they are?